I love going to visit my in-laws! The country atmosphere is always a good change for this city girl. I love sitting on the front porch in THE most comfortable chair, watching my kids play in the front yard surrounded by huge pine trees, and the only sound is the occasional car passing or a train in the distance.
My husband and I enjoy going there because it is a place that helps us unwind and relax. Well, one weekend we had a moment that wasn't so relaxing. Now don't judge me! We all know that every married couple has one or two of these moments. It was a Sunday morning and time to get ready for church. Usually this process is pretty smooth. After almost 14 years of being married, you would think we would have learned.
I was almost ready to leave. Hair done, church clothes on, make-up finished, diaper bag packed, and the 2 kids remaining at the house were ready to go. My husband's parents had already left with our middle daughter (which was a good thing!) There was one thing left to do. I had to make use of the restroom because of the 3 cups of coffee I had downed earlier. I rushed to the only bathroom in the house where I found my amazing husband displaying his very good dental hygiene. He was flossing. At the time, I felt my reasoning for making use of the bathroom far outweighed his! Unfortunately, he felt his reasoning outweighed mine! Here is where our MOMENT began. At first the tone remained calm. When no one gave, the tone escalated. Thankfully, our 2 kids were outside playing, as the tone escalated even more. Close to a roar, I finally said, "Quit Flossing and Let Me In!" Eventually, when he was done flossing, he let me in and everything was fine. We weren't talking and finished getting ready for church. One last check in the mirror for each of us and the tension was horrible. We looked at each other and started laughing. Yes, all ended well, but what about that Moment? Could it have been avoided?
I am still learning, and don't claim to be an expert about marriage. Tim and I both agreed we were each just worried about our own needs, and how giving a little would have changed the situation entirely. Looking back, here's what I would change. I would not raise my voice. Knowing he wouldn't be flossing for an hour, I would walk away and redirect my attention to something else until he was done. I would think about the fact that many women I know, would love it if there husbands were still here on this earth to be standing in the bathroom.
I was just thinking about this weekend and the lessons I need to learn from it. I've been watching my husband this weekend and thanking God for him. I'm taking to heart these lessons and will be working on them when the next MOMENT comes.
